Love hurts: Predicting trajectories of marital satisfaction from couples’ behaviour during discussions of interpersonal injuries

Interpersonal injuries are inevitable in intimate relationships (cf. Fincham, 2000) and addressing the emotional fallout from these experiences is challenging. Although interpersonal injuries have important consequences for relationships (Lemay et al., 2012), little is known about the dyadic process that facilitates the resolution of hurt feelings and helps couples to maintain or to strengthen relationship well-being. I examined whether couples’ observed behaviour during discussions of interpersonal injuries predicted trajectories of marital satisfaction over two years. Multilevel modelling indicated that marital satisfaction declined over two years, and wives’ positive behaviour during discussions of husbands’ hurt feelings buffered declines in wives’ satisfaction. Specifically, wives who were more emotionally positive had increases in marital satisfaction, whereas wives who were less emotionally positive had decreases in marital satisfaction. Husbands’ and wives’ negative behaviour during discussions of husbands’ hurt feelings hastened declines in marital satisfaction for both spouses. Couples’ behaviour during discussions of wives’ hurt feelings did not moderate trajectories of marital satisfaction, with one exception. Husbands who asked more questions during the discussion of wives’ hurt feelings had increases in marital satisfaction, whereas husbands who asked fewer questions had decreases in marital satisfaction over time. Couples’ ability to navigate discussions of hurt feelings following interpersonal injury may be critical for repairing and maintaining relationship well-being.